I told you one of my goals is to lose weight. I haven't updated lately on all my goals, so I'll have to do that soon. I've decided to only do it once or twice a month, so I'll get around to it. Eventually. ;)
Anyway, back to the other goal. I've still only lost 11 lbs. I'm stuck. And getting VERY frustrated. At what point do I say, I'm not going to look like Jennifer Aniston, so why bother? At what point do I say, if you don't like me simply because of how I look, then that's YOUR problem, not mine? At what point do I say, I'm in a crappy mood all of the time worrying about it, so why do I keep bothering? At what point do I say, as long as I start making better choices about the things I eat MOST of the time, then what's wrong with not looking like a super model?
I GET that it's unhealthy. I understand that. But honestly, I can't remember when I WASN'T overweight. And no, I'm not happy about it, but maybe there's worse things I could be? I'm not a drug addict. I don't beat my kids. I'm not a thief. Does being overweight make me a bad person? I don't think so, but I think other people do. I think a lot of people don't take the time to get to really know me because I don't fit the "ideal" of what I should be. I never have been. But that doesn't make me a bad person. I LOVE my kids. I LOVE my husband. I LOVE my family and friends. Shouldn't I be judged on THOSE things instead of how I look?
I've spent most of my kids lives telling them not to judge people by the way they look. There is no black and white. There is no rich and poor. There is no smart and dumb. People are PEOPLE. First and foremost. Get to know them, before you decide whether or not you want to be friends with them. Don't judge them on the way they look. Judge them on who they ARE. And I think they're pretty good about following that. So if my kids can see past the way people look, then why can't adults? Aren't WE supposed to be setting good examples for our children? For the future generation? Aren't WE supposed to be teaching them how to grow up to be respectful and trustworthy? How can we expect THEM to do those things, when we don't do them ourselves?
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28 comments:
I'm in the same boat. I agree that it sucks to be judged for your appearance, but that's just life. It's great that you are teaching your kids to look beyond the book's cover. However, I'm trying to look at weight from the angle of "better health" than better looks. You want to be around for a long life with your kids and grandkids, right? All we can do is keep trying to be the very best we can be. Keep at it. I know you can do it.
I know it's healthier, but I think I'm taking the stance that it didn't just APPEAR overnight, so it's not going to DISAPPEAR overnight either. At first I was wanting to lose it really fast. Now, I'm okay with taking it slow. If I lose 11 lbs every 2 months, I'm okay with that. That still means that I'll be 66 lbs lighter by the end of the year. That's not bad.
There's nothing wrong with taking it slow. After the initial loss, isn't it normal to only lose about 1-2 pounds a week? Hang in there!
And yes, it's totally okay not to look like Jennifer Aniston. I'm convinced not even Jennifer Aniston looks like that- the power of airbrushing. ;)
Sorry I missed this one last week. And thanks for stopping my blog yesterday. I've had the same thought -- I've been big for so long that maybe my body doesn't know how to be otherwise.
You said something about having given up. Sometimes I think we make more progress by taking a break than by trying to beat our head against a wall. That doesn't mean Maggie Moo's for dinner every night. But maybe just ignore the scale for a couple of weeks. Practice mindful eating without actually dieting.
Of course, I may not be the best to give advice. But know that I know where you're coming from and I'm in it with you.
Kids are sometimes able to see past things that adults fixate on. We definitely get more critical as we age! I lost quite a bit of weight before the wedding and gained almost 100% back ... now trying to lose it again!
I'm working really hard to focus on being healthy and not trying to get my pre-baby body back. But it's hard. It's so easy to put that pressure on ourselves.
Aww, I just did a similar post the other day. I've been so frustrated with myself lately but haven't had the motivation to get moving.
I'm right there with you, believe me. It's so hard. And so easy to get frustrated.
The good thing is that you are trying. It can be frustrating when you want something so badly & it seems like it's never going to happen...or take forever to happen. But just keep trying & having faith. Good luck!
Stopping by from the @SITS #commenthour
Awesome points you make... I do wish more people would look beyond appearance to the heart. Read an awesome story about this in Grace-Based Parenting where the father had to respond to his young son's request to bleach his hair. His response was awesome, even though it was a bit of a struggle for some of the very reasons you mention!
(Visiting from the SITS #CommentHour)
Keep pushing!! I've been there. I was so frustrated around the 16 pound mark and I kept believing and thinking positive and I'm now at the 55 mark and it feels amazing. I'm rooting for you!!!
Man Wife and Dog Blog
It is hard. There are no magic answers. If there were, I'd have found them by now. HUGE hugs to you for teaching your children to honor people for who they are on the inside.
I so appreciate your honesty on this subject. It's true, we know we shouldn't judge, we try to teach our children not to judge and yet we do. I say just feel good about yourself and it does not matter what the scale says.
Indeed. I like that you are teaching your children that important fact about not judging.
Remember that you are their best example so don't be too hard on yourself. The images we see are not real they are photoshoped to the max and being supermodel thin is not idealistic.
Cheers to you!
You can do this!!! Just keep going!
There is nothing more frustrating than a plateau! But keep going! You can do this! This is a great post!
Stopping by from SITS comment hour!
I hear your frustration. Hang in there. Focus on being healthy and the rest will follow. I'm sure you are a beautiful person and you are teaching your children not to judge a book by its cover.
the older I get the more I realize that what is most important is how I feel about myself...DO it for you! I know that is easier said than done ~because I still care what others think but a lot less today!
Just keep on keeping on!!! Thank you for sharing so openly.
Stopping by from SITS comment hour!
11 pounds is great. That is more than I have been able to do this year. I probably have gained that much.
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eileen
I feel you! I always hit a weight loss plateau and then I start thinking: what am I doing this for? Can't I just be okay the way I am? I know it's not healthy, too. And I see my baby and I know I need to be healthy for her. But at what point do I say I am not going to reach my goal weight so I need to pick an "ok" weight and move on with my life.
Don't give up! Find a sport or activity and do it. Do you like to cycle? OMG, so fun. And, you can meet a ton of folks. Commit. I've had a difficult time with commitment over the years and realized I'm only cheating myself. I recently gained 20 pounds and I was like WHAT? How did this happen? Duh, I ate biscuits and bread and Starbucks drinks daily. Can't do it. Cut the carbs. Eat cottage cheese for breakfast. There are some great fat free or caloric counting diet/cookbooks out there. Get a plan going. You'll love it!! Just be the best you can be.
My husband is a "BIG" man... so I understand what you're going through.
Losing weight slow is better for you.
Losing weight slow it usually stays off longer.
Go for a walk every day, and every day make it a block, two blocks, a 1/2 mile, a mile longer. You'll be running before you know it... and you'll have a perfect time to thank God for your wonderful friends and family.
Visiting from March 16th Comment Hour!
Toqua
http://ToquasCrafts.blogspot.com
Hang in there! It's hard to lose weight (just ask my mom) but you can do it!! :D
And not to be cruel or mean or nothing but seriously.. the font.. painful for the eyes.
I am a huge believer that you have to feel good about yourself on the inside, and others will see that on the outside. I work on that every day.
11 pounds is great! And there is nothing wrong with taking slow! Good luck with your weigh loss journey!
New follower from the comment hour last night!
way to go ~
never give up. I agrees with your post. I myself is even an obese girl BUT hey, as long as I know that I've tried my best to become healthy..it doesn't matter what people says.. do they know that we need lots of encouragement to just try to eat healthy and say NO to those delicious and FAT food?
weight lost slowly is more likely to stay off anyway. At least that's what I keep telling myself. My weight has been more stationary than dropping. At least I'm not gaining at the moment.
I say hang in there you can do it! losing weight doesn't just happen over night...if you do it right and go slow you could be at your goal weight in a year!
Im struggling at losing weight myself but If I lose 1 or 2 pounds a month I'm happy!
Its true that people are fast to judge, but I say don't pay attention to them..be yourself and be happy just the way you are! and when you love yourself it could be easier to lose the weight :)
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